America's Next Top Automotive Journalist

Keep it Unplugged!

I like people who tell it like it is. If you are an upfront person, we can hang. I think a lot of drama happens in life because people are not communicating enough.

As you’ve heard many times, communication is key to survival. Would you rather be told there’s a hit man on the loose in your neighborhood, or wait until you were stabbed? Would you rather be told there was a fire in the movie theater, or would you rather find out with the silver screen ablaze, fire exits blocked by a wall of flames?

In 95 percent of cases, more communication is better than less. In 99 percent of cases, some communication is better than none.

So when I am at a party you are hosting, don’t you dare offer me a cup of coffee to suggest that I should be leaving soon. I know you heard that b.s. somewhere like Oprah or the Today Show, but seriously, give it a break. Lighten up and stop trying to be a “nice person”. I can see right through you.

Your tired ass wants to get to bed because you’re some wax job who decided to throw a shindig the night before you have to wake up early. Hey, just because you can’t survive sleeping less than 9 ½ hours doesn’t mean you should expect me to leave your house at 8 o’ friggin’ clock.

I’d have much more respect for you if you told me, “Get the eff out!” At least I’d know you’re comfortable enough with me to tell me what I need to hear ’cause honestly, this beating around the bush crap is for the birds.

Once you offer me that coffee, my initial impulse is to hold back the urge to hurl the coffee into your face. Once I avoid that potential lawsuit, I’m immediately clued in to who you are. You’re someone who says more words in your mind than you do through your mouth.

Mouth: hey “friend”, that’s a nice new car you got there …

Mind: … yeah, nice if your mother picked it out for you.

Seriously, if you’re one of those people, I hope you crap your pants three times as much when you’re a senior citizen.

Speak your mind! It feels better that way. You’ll end up saving a ton on adult diapers.